For those of you who are married, is your husband doing the whole weight loss thing with you? Mine is, and let me tell you, it’s annoying! He’s lost more than I have, he still weighs less than I do, he’s dropped a pants size, and I’m frustrated! Not that I want him to be unhealthy, but he doesn’t have nearly as much to lose as I do.
It doesn’t stop there, though. He gets annoyed if I work out without him. So, do I wait until he’s available (um, midnight or so, once the kids settle down), get up at 6 (yeah, right), or just work out without him and hear him whine? We have a weight machine, which means taking turns. Plus, it means we can’t work out unless the baby’s in bed, because he’ll come along and get his fingers pinched. I’d just rather do it in the afernoon when he’s napping than wait until night. And as far as my treadmill, it’s in the room we’re finishing, and Hubby’s got it pushed into a corner with a sheet over it to keep dust off (so at least I can say my treadmill’s not gathering dust, haha). How am I supposed to use it?
I don’t mean to be complaining. I’m glad he wants to do things with me, believe me. But I kind of feel like he’s blocking me at every turn. I’m not even sure I want advice here, I just felt the need to vent, and to find out if anyone could commiserate.
I guess I’m blessed. My husband always says that he rides on my coat tails when I loose weight. He won’t do it unless I do. I have to say. This time I am loosing more than him though. Maybe that’s because I walk faithfully everyday and am now also doing a 30 min ab video 3 days a week. Oh, did I mention that I also have to push a double stroller on my walk? He comes home and gets on the Tony Little Gazelle for 30 mins. I keep telling him it’s not the same thing. I think it’s great that your husband is in full suport of you though. Have you talked to him about what you want to achieve and the time you want to achieve it in? Maybe give him a synopsis of your day. I have to remind mine occasionally of my “daily scedule”. It couldn’t hurt to talk to him.
Comment by Tami — September 20, 2006 @ 5:16 am
Yep, and mine is losing faster than me, too. The thing is, though, that men have a higher muscle to fat thing going on which gives them a naturally higher metabolism. My husband is also just a little under 100 pounds heavier than me (and nearly a foot taller) so he needs to lose more than me.
Women also tend to hold onto fat more in their 30’s and early 40’s because they are still fertile (even if you have had a tubal or other surgery and still have your ovaries - *Leann just used the word ovaries on the internet - snickering childishly*). Your body is still in “having a baby” mode and does not want to give up fat easily. Men do NOT have that issue - at least not until Dr. Frankenstein science catches up with them.
Whether we want to admit it or not our bodies are very different and our dietary needs are very different from that of our husbands. Sickeningly frustrating but true… *sigh* The great thing is that most husbands see our efforts to lose and not the pounds themselves and think we are hotties anyway. (you might want to check out the book by Shaunti Feldham called For Women Only - men are turned on when they see us doing something to change our bodies - so the effort is the most important part for them) I think what you are experiencing with him is not sabotage but a very personal need for him to spend time with you and maybe even pride in the fact that his wife is changing for the better.
Comment by Leann — September 20, 2006 @ 7:31 am
Well… I’m married to a six foot tall lean mean fighting Marine (actually he’s not mean- he’s very sweet) so I have the frustration of a husband who has no clue what I’m going through. But he’s very supportive and has never reproached me for my size.
How about you exercise twice?? Get your good workout during the day and then maybe a family walk in the evening? I definitely think you should have a talk with him about finding ways to do things together without compromising your workouts. After all, the more you get what you need fitness wise- the more energy you will have to do things (wink wink nudge nudge say no more) with him!
Comment by blestwithsons — September 20, 2006 @ 7:45 am
Oh my goodness…If you all could see my color right now. Thanks Blest!!
Comment by Tami — September 20, 2006 @ 9:29 am
Thanks, guys! I’ll talk to him when he gets back from his business trip tomorrow.
And Blest, I just love that you quoted Monty Python in your answer.
Comment by Jana — September 20, 2006 @ 10:12 am
Tami, that’s nothing. Go back to the early days when we found out how many calories you burn… Um never mind.
Jana, Well, you’re a man of the world, squire!
Comment by blestwithsons — September 20, 2006 @ 10:15 am