Cross posted at my blog - but with an extra paragraph over here…
When I started writing my Nehemiah posts (part one , part two) I thought I would work my way through the book in order… But life doesn’t always go in order, does it? I’ve started some building projects lately… Building health into my body through exercise and good eating habits. Building structure into my homeschooling. These are not building efforts which will bring my enemy joy. I thought my next post would be about the attacks which come from without when a building project is begun. But the attacks which came against me this week were not from without. So I must skip ahead in Nehemiah to take a look at the enemy within.
In Nehemiah 4, we are told that the walls have been built to half their height. The job is proceeding nicely, and the first and second wave of enemy efforts have been dealt with. But then the people came to Nehemiah with a problem:
Nehemiah 5:1-9 Now there was a great outcry of the people and of their wives against their Jewish brothers. For there were those who said, “We, our sons and our daughters are many; therefore let us get grain that we may eat and live.”
There were others who said, “We are mortgaging our fields, our vineyards and our houses that we might get grain because of the famine.”
Also there were those who said, “We have borrowed money for the king’s tax on our fields and our vineyards. Now our flesh is like the flesh of our brothers, our children like their children Yet behold, we are forcing our sons and our daughters to be slaves, and some of our daughters are forced into bondage already, and we are helpless because our fields and vineyards belong to others.”
Then I was very angry when I had heard their outcry and these words. I consulted with myself and contended with the nobles and the rulers and said to them, “You are exacting usury, each from his brother!” Therefore, I held a great assembly against them. I said to them, “We according to our ability have redeemed our Jewish brothers who were sold to the nations; now would you even sell your brothers that they may be sold to us?” Then they were silent and could not find a word to say. Again I said, “The thing which you are doing is not good; should you not walk in the fear of our God because of the reproach of the nations, our enemies?
The attacks which came from without had failed to bring a halt to the reconstruction of the walls. Perhaps at this point the people were beginning to feel comfortable and confident that their building project would be successful. But when you are about God’s business, it doesn’t pay to let down your guard.
1 Peter 5:8 Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
I thought I had my project under control. The weight loss has been going really well and I can’t say that it’s been difficult. I don’t even know how it has happened, but I have found that resisting food temptation has been easy -and I’ve become addicted to working out! No problems! And no outside attacks. No one has tried to sabotage me or tempt me with treats. No one has said “Oh - you don’t need to lose weight!” I have been met with unstinting support (of which you ladies are no small part!) for which I am very grateful! But last week, I found myself beset by issues and distractions which did not come from outside the walls, but from within. Like Nehemiah, I saw my projects undermined by sins which didn’t have to get past any gate because they were already in the heart of the builder.
My sins were not sins involving food, or exercise - they sprang from a completely different area.* But after some reflection, I’ve realized that the root was the same. Self-indulgence. Like a spiritual game of Whack-A-Mole, I had swatted my fleshly nature in one place, and I thought I had it beaten down. But it bounced back up grinning and I wasn’t ready with a mallet. Before I knew it I was in a tailspin of my own making, forgetting what I was supposed to be doing, avoiding time in the Word, avoiding prayer… Oh yeah, I kept on eating right and exercising. And if my ultimate goal were to be physically fit, then there wouldn’t be a problem. But there was more to rebuilding Jerusalem then simply laying bricks, and there is more to building me into the woman God wants than just getting trim. I may discipline my body and make it my slave (1 Cor 9:27), but if my spirit has wandered away from God in the process, I gain nothing.
Many years ago, I bought a skin care product with alpha-hydroxy stuff in it. The lady who sold it to me told me that I would probably notice more break-outs before seeing the promised improvements in my skin. The product would bring to the surface impurities which were buried in my pores…so things would get worse before they got better. I think that this weight-loss journey may be operating in much the same way. As I get a handle on the surface issues of caring properly for my body, the deeper issues - deeper sins that have been buried and restrained under layers of fat - are beginning to make their ugly way to the surface.
As far as a technique for handling these sins from within…Nehemiah’s approach was fairly simple. He told the people to cut it out.
Nehemiah 5:10b-13 “…Please, let us leave off this usury. Please, give back to them this very day their fields, their vineyards, their olive groves and their houses, also the hundredth part of the money and of the grain, the new wine and the oil that you are exacting from them.”
Then they said, “We will give it back and will require nothing from them; we will do exactly as you say ” So I called the priests and took an oath from them that they would do according to this promise.
I also shook out the front of my garment and said, “Thus may God shake out every man from his house and from his possessions who does not fulfill this promise; even thus may he be shaken out and emptied ” And all the assembly said, “Amen!” And they praised the LORD. Then the people did according to this promise.
That and he pointed out to them that God would deal with those who continued in their sin. And honestly, there is no other approach for me. I know that what I’ve been doing is wrong. I know that, although it may be fun for a season, the end result will leave me “shaken out and emptied” - and not in a good way. I have to remember that…
1 Timothy 4:8 …bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come.
And while I’m watching the walls, I need to keep a close eye on the builder too.
*if you’re curious as to the nature of my problem, let’s just say that I could give Walter Mitty a run for his money
Great post, blest. The same issues are a-stir this way.
And just so you know, I had to google Walter Mitty. I think I get you….
Comment by lady laura — September 5, 2006 @ 2:58 pm
((hugs)) you know I’ve been praying for you
) Loved this post…so applicable no matter what the sin.
Comment by Blair — September 5, 2006 @ 3:40 pm
Blest I can echo your exact thoughts. I have expressed this to my mentor via emails. I have not had any food temptation…I have been working out great…but I noticed that I was grumpier with my kids (ie. “can’t you see I’m trying to be alone with God so GO AWAY” — it wasn’t THAT dramatic but you get the point). I was also a frequent shopper at the “nag” department. Great thougths…
Comment by Mandi — September 5, 2006 @ 7:10 pm
It takes courage to stand up in front of a group of people and admit a shortcoming. Way to have courage. This was a great post and really applicable to…well anyone.
Comment by Tami — September 6, 2006 @ 4:26 am